Jill Zarin Episode 7 Extended Blog
Hi everyone! I have been busy this week working on the new packaging for my Skweez Couture Shapewear, Hosiery and Legging line. I haven't done this in a while so it was harder than I remember! I can't wait for you to see it. Please follow me on twitter @skweezcouture and Facebook SKWEEZ COUTURE for updates. Secrets Of A Jewish Mother is now out in paperback and has an added chapter on bullying that my mom, Gloria has many words of advice to share. Autographed copies are available at zarinfabrics.com Jill Zarin bedding is available at bedbathandbeyond.com
I loved seeing Luann and Sonja have a lunch that wasn't about bashing anyone, just working together to plan a fabulous trip to Morocco. I had heard so much about it and seeing that I am finally kid free, I was able to leave home for a week with my girlfriends. I know how many children we have among us and how hard it is for everyone to leave their lives, so to say "trip of a lifetime" is an understatement. I rarely leave Bobby for even one night, unless I am visiting my parents. When I asked him if he would mind if I went without him, he didn't try to control me and make me feel guilty. Hearing Ramona say they don't respect women in Morocco made me cringe. Morocco is not Iran or Saudi Arabia. Her ignorance is no longer a viable excuse. Wait until you see what happens when we actually get there!
It was interesting seeing Luann and Ramona have lunch together. They never have lunch together unless there are cameras in the room. I am so grateful that Luann tried to stick up for me. Ramona is a hypocrite. She says "talking behind people's back" as if she doesn't? The entire show is about us living our lives and then talking to the camera and sharing our real feelings. Is that gossip or a TV show? Ramona has said horrible things behind my back too. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. At least I own it. She admits to putting her foot in her mouth and her opening line says it all, "If people can't handle the truth, it's really not my problem." When Ramona said she didn't have a problem with anyone I almost threw up. When talking about Cindy she said "I don't have a problem with her"! No of course you don't Ramona. You just say and do whatever you want. Then when she doesn't like the reaction? She attacks. She should realize that her actions cause reactions.
Ramona has a pattern of doing this to all of us at one time or another. Ramona likes to pick fights out of nowhere. Why did she attack me at her party in front of her guests? Was time of the essence? Why wouldn't she let Jennifer tell me to my face what she told Ramona? I'll tell you why. It was because she knew that they set me up and Jennifer could lie behind my back but not lie to my face. She talks out of both sides of her mouth. First she tells Luann "I don't want to talk behind Jill's back" but then she talks behind MY BACK with Jennifer. Hypocrite?
Ramona said she would talk to me before our trip. I did tell Luann I didn't want to go anywhere with anyone without resolving past issues and starting with a clean slate. I felt really good that I had made up with Alex. We agreed that anything we did or said about each other before that day we would forgive and start over. I can honestly say that I have tried to get along with Alex and not have any conflicts.
Car ride to Spa: finally, I am in my comfort zone with real friends who respect each other and I'm not worried that there would be a knife in my back when I woke up. We all have our little quirks and they get amplified when you are on a trip together. This was a good test to see if we could all get along for 7 days in Morocco. I thought we should take the blondes as a trial run since Kelly didn't want to even be in a room with Ramona. Cindy's brother was still reeling from Ramona attacking him at her party and of course there was Ramona's unprovoked attack on me at her party. In the car, Kelly shared with Luann about her past relationships. Cindy and I were in the backseat and couldn't hear them. I felt terrible that I couldn't comfort her too.
The only bad thing about that day, was the car ride from hell! What should have been a three hour ride took six hours. The driver went the wrong way. It was a nightmare.
We had such a good time..I wish we could have stayed a week. The game we played was actually one my sister, Lisa Wexler made up when we took a family girls trip to TURKS a few years ago. It was so much fun. I also had received a package of Skweez Couture hosiery before we left for the ladies to try. Thigh highs, corsets and leggings. They all tried them on and modeled them around the room. It was such a great scene, I felt badly they cut it. Oh well.
Thank you to Teri Jon (Ricky Freeman) for hosting my first annual Anti-Bullying Charity Event. You have a huge heart and you are an amazing designer. Also, Christina DeSimone, my dear friend. Christina started People Reaching Out, appropriately named to raise money for various charities. I asked her to help me with this event. It is so much work and I couldn't do it without her.
When I heard Luann tell Ramona how rude she is to block her from a designer I laughed. Ramona did the same to me! I asked Teri Jon to lend clothes to all the ladies. I don't remember Ramona telling me she wouldn't accept it since she doesn't want to wear the same designers as me. I will be sure to tell all my favorite designers to extend her the same kindness. Alex was very nice a few years ago to share one of her contacts and I am always happy to share mine.
I was so happy my mom, Aunt Cookie, my sister Lisa and Allyson came to support me that day. My very special step daughter, Jennifer Zarin, made me so proud. Jennifer has her masters degree and is a Life Coach. She started a Facebook page called The Birthmark Project. I hope people who connected to Jennifer and to what we are trying to do will LIKE her page. You can contact Jennifer through Facebook.
I was so overwhelmed after her speech. When Ramona came over to me and said "you didn't notice her face is deformed," I didn't even know what to say. Now I know why Kelly won't let her around her children. Can you imagine if Jennifer heard that? (Of course she did now) I am embarrassed by her behavior. My mother always told me you become more of who you are when you get older. Ramona is getting more "Rameana" every week.
I need to address the Darren/Ramona wine issue. It really was like a game of Telephone. I told Darren to do something. He may not have done exactly what I asked and we got a different result. As far as I knew, I asked my assistant to get auction items. I told Darren to contact all the girls to see if they wanted to promote their products. The caterer ordered colorful martinis (which we paid for!) but most of the guests drank soft drinks and water since it was 11AM when it began. If we needed wine for the party, we would have asked for 10 cases for 200 people (30 bottles to fill glasses on the table and have a one glass refill). I would have sent a car service to pick it up as I picked up all of the other fabulous donations including the four night stay at Canyon Ranch, ReVive Skin Care and bedding from Zarin Fabrics.
Obviously there was a misunderstanding. I asked the girls to donate something so I could promote their brand. I knew Ramona's wine was coming out this spring and we called her to give her a platform to promote it on the TV SHOW. That is what friends do. Friends show up at their events, which I did weeks before, and have them put their products in goodie bags or silent auction (did you hear me mention Luann's CD on the show?) Rather than waste it filling glasses, since many guests weren't drinking alcohol, I asked her to set it up on the silent auction table. Either way, once I asked her not to serve it she should have said "fine". Darren was wrong. I told her that. She went behind my back and did what she wanted anyway. The caterer was upset. They didn't have enough wine glasses and were serving out of martini glasses.
I have always supported the ladies any way I can. If one of us has success, we all succeed. I have gone to more book signings and product launches than I can remember. In fact, Bobby and I were the only ones at Ramona's wine event last week on the Upper East Side. Alex had just left but no one else came. I was there. I am always there. Ramona and I have a complicated friendship and if things fester too long it gets worse. WE need to resolve this. I don't hate Ramona. I just hate some of the things she says or does to hurt me or people I love.
I was grateful she brought the case but instead of ending up in the silent auction the bottles started to disappear and only to her table. No one else was drinking the wine. I think that she brought the wine as her own stash, for her and her few friends at her table. Either way there was a breakdown in communication from what I asked my assistant to do and what he told Ramona, and what she brought to the party. Like the game Telephone. The most embarrassing moment was when she was caught by the Teri Jon employees re-corking the open bottles to take home with her. Why did she do that? Gross? It's just vulgar to donate wine, drink half, re-cork and take back home.
I have to say Ramona and I have always had a strange relationship but something always keeps us connected. This too shall pass...I hope.
Next week, Morocco!
Love,
Jill XO