Upon watching part 2 of the reunion this evening this saying is what popped into my head. So I ask you, where is the divinity amongst some of my castmates?
Self reflection and growth is always important. I am proud of how I came full circle this season. I realized the things I could have done better and attempted to correct them or sincerely apologize for them where I could. But I ask you, where is the forgiveness? At what point are enough apologies enough? What else can a person do to right a wrong? Why are some people’s apologies fully accepted immediately, yet mine seem to be falling on deaf ears? I feel like the first two parts of this reunion all that you’ve heard me say is “I’m sorry”. While I certainly am sorry about many things, what did I do that was so gregious that these women just do not have in their hearts to forgive? Or at the very least put aside and move forward? Does it seem to you that there is more here than meets the eye?
I have received so many letters from all of you that virtually beg me to stop apologizing. Well thank you for opening my eyes. I have apologized enough. I am going to be divine and forgive them for having such closed hearts.
I have so much in my life to be thankful for and that is my focus. This experience has enlightened me and energized me. I could not have gotten through this season without all of your wonderful support. Thank you for taking me into your hearts.
Visit me at here at www.jillzarin.com and www.secretsofajewishmother.com and let me know how you feel. I can’t answer every comment but know I will read them all..though it may take a little while!
I Love you all!
XOXO
Jill
June 28th, 2010 at 4:58 pm
Jill, I have been meaning to write to you regarding your “spat” with Bethanny. I know exactly what you are going through as I had a “Bethanny” in my life for over 35 years. She treated and continues her cruelty towards me. I have learned so much and the most important thing I learned about that relationship was she was NEVER my friend. I so agree with you when you made the comment about finding out about her Dad’s death that you were willing to forgive and forget. When I found out about her sister’s accidental death, I was devastated for her and wanted her to run into my arms and was treated horribly and was told that if I continue my calls they were going to put a retraining order against me. Another lesson? My problem is that I sought validation and also how over bearing I can be when I care for someone but no more. I save those emotions for family. Stick with your sister, she will NEVER hurt you that way and will appreciate your kind heart. I adore all the housewives but as for Kelly? She is a trouble maker and a liar. I don’t think Alex is a bad person. She just doesn’t know how to express herself. Instead of her writing maybe she should do some self help reading on expressing herself. Take care Jill! xoxo
June 25th, 2010 at 12:03 pm
After becoming addicted to the Housewives of NYC and Jersey, I have to honestly say that Jill, LuAnn and Kelly are my FAVORITES! Romana acts like shes snorted a tad bit too much of “something”, Alex really does look like she’s channeling the devil and Bethenny is… like she stated on a previous show “has alot of roller rink” in her.
I was flabergasted by the way Jill and Kelly were treated on the “scary island” show…I don’t think Jill needs to apologize anymore…she really wasnt any worse then the 3 stooges (R,A & B)
You, LuAnn and Kelly are 3 classy ladies!
Do any of you remember the show where Alex’s son started beating the food on a man’s plate as he was trying to eat? OMG..and she writes a book on child rearing? LMAO…too funny.
and why does Romina always wear the SAME JEWELRY every show?
and sorry Bethenny…you are NOT all that and a bag of chips…get over yourself.
June 24th, 2010 at 11:58 pm
Jill,
You are a strong person. Bethenny will come around in time. I can see it in her eyes the love she has for you. She’s hurt, give her time and space and she will be your friend again. You both care for one another and there is a strong bond between the two of you. I would just give her some time.
Alex is very cruel and I would stay far away from her. She is everything that she accuses you of! Mean!
Hang in there. Those girls should quit trying to act like the almight and stop passing judgement on you and everyone else.
Ignore the unkindness. When they see that they are not getting a reaction out of you they will move on. Sad how immature some of them are behaving. Stay strong. You are a wonderful kind person!
Tracie
June 23rd, 2010 at 6:33 pm
Jill -
I really admire strong women – they make me proud to be a woman. I think you are a strong woman – intelligent, funny, kind, sensitive (and just so you know it, the prettiest on the show). Never compromise who you are. There’s an old saying that I love: Do what you want and say what you feel. The people that matter don’t mind and the people that mind, don’t matter.
I just have one questions for you – how have you been friends with Ramona for so long. She is way toooooooooooooooooo much. And as far as Kelly goes; I’m sure she’s a lovely person, but I wouldn’t hang out with her too much and I certainly wouldn’t trust her.
June 21st, 2010 at 8:26 pm
Jill i just wish the best for you. stay with the show. You were my favorite in the beginning then I couldn’t stand you this season. I want too see you redeem yourself and be the Jill i used to know. XXOO
June 20th, 2010 at 10:46 am
Hi Jill,
This is my first comment ever on a blog, but I wanted to let you know that you are and always have been my favorite housewife. You are so intelligent, poised and classy. No one on the show can hold a candle to you. Alex really has to watch all the previous seasons shows because the things she accused you of were done ten times worse by Ramona and Bethany. Alex’s behaviour has been ludicrous and she should be mortified on how she came across this season. I do hope you stay on the show because you have so many fans who support you. Based on what I saw on the show, it appeared that Ramona, Bethany and Alex are “mean girls” who have victimized you due to their insecurities and jealousy. Best wishes!
June 20th, 2010 at 9:27 am
Jill,
Well, I just don’t think forgiveness is instantaneous. While I do think it’s important to say, “I’m sorry,” I also am a firm believer in showing it. Now, you have a great opportunity to show it by using only kind, positive words and statements despite your disappointment with how things stand between you. Time heals and if in another year from now you want things to truely be better, stay positive and kill them with genuine kindness.
Becky
June 19th, 2010 at 9:44 pm
I am feeling horrible for you. You broke my heart everytime I saw you try to apologize and were shut down. However I can definitely see both sides of the coin. It seems to me that the hurt inflicted by you to Bethany runs deep and I think she needs time. Maybe alot of time, a good friendship is worth waiting for. I believe that you regret what happened and want to fix it now, but unfortunately its not always that easy. I agree that you should stop apologizing, I don’t beleive that Bethany wants you to keep apologizing. I think it just needs to be put to rest right now.
I had a very close friend for 15 years and we had a falling out that lasted 5 years. When we were brought back together there was never a need to even bring up what split us apart. Our freindship is in a very good place now and we both grew from the experience.
June 19th, 2010 at 8:04 pm
Jill….The reunion was so hard for me to watch! I am so sorry for you. We all have months and years when we are not at our best, it seems the others castmates are holding you at a higher standard…They want to be forgiven, but they don’t want to forgive or forget for that matter! So happy you will be back. Lots of love and support from Texas!
June 19th, 2010 at 5:05 pm
Jill, you are so much like me. Or is it that I am like you? You truly care. I spent to much of my life trying to please my so called friends, we all talked behind each others backs. Of course we did we are women. It took me a long time to figure out they hurt my feelings so many times. Of course they blamed me for it seemed everything that was wrong. Funny there were 3 of them too. I woke up, realized I had a wonderful marriage, a great son and daughter-in-law. I truly did not need them, they needed me as a whipping girl. Some women are just mean, and jealous. You cannot change them, and they think your the one that needs to change. How wrong they are. Now I do have true friends. We treat each other with care and kindness. The others…well they are still happy in their misery. I only wish them all at least half the happiness that we have. God bless you and your wonderful family!!!
June 18th, 2010 at 8:30 pm
Dear Jill,
I don’t usually blog on the housewives except to my cute husband, but I felt compelled to email you to tell you, that you don’t need this crap! I think you are the most sincere person on the show. Whatever you decide moving forward or not with Bethenny is up to you, but if I were you I would count my lucky stars. With friends like her Ramona, (who cares you’ve known her for 15 years) much good that did when you popped over, Alex ( I don’t even think she knows who she is), and well Bethenny – I have one thing to say. What you sew is what you reap! I didn’t like her from the first season, I saw right through her friendship with you and I felt that you made the right decision to forgive, but to cut her from your life. If you don’t, that’s your decision. You helped her and I am having a hard time seeing her as some angel especially since she is a first class user and manipulator. Probably now that she’s had a baby she will change and take stock, but they are sitting on the show giving you a hard time where they are exactly the same. It’s the hypocrisy that gets me! I think you are fabulous. Learn the lessons you need to – forgive and move on. I had people like Bethenny in my life and after all I did for them, I still wish them the best. Sometimes, God brings people to us for a reason and when they leave us we need to let them go. It’s not easy, but we need to let it go. I wish you the best in your life! Choose your friends wisely.
June 18th, 2010 at 8:09 pm
I have never done this (blogged before.)First I would like to say that you Jill, are my favorite. You should have a show of your own. I love the fact that your husband Bobby stands beside you and not behind you. Apparently alot viewers watched a completely different show than I did. I did not see you any more outspoken than the rest of them or making nasty comments or showing off. I can say after watching the reunion show they can be lucky it were you they were attacking and not Ramona. I think she could become violent- what is she bi-polar or what? So with that I would like to comment on all the housewives:
Ramona- crazy eyes and competely hostile not to mention rude and conceited. And Im with you on renewing vows, why 17 years, why not wait until 20.And she’s a new person, oh yeah even nastier.
Alex- A wanna be socialite. People applaud her for standing up, please, She’s the true meaning of the word beeoch not mention “mean girl”. I think she sides with those who can get take her places,God has a special place for people like her.
Bethany-Just plain nasty.I get the feeling she thinks she’s a step above. Well, honey I got news for you your not. God created us all equal, some of you might have more than alot of us but it don’t make you any better. And we all have to answer for the things we’ve done, and that includes being just plain nasty and rude. I did watch part of her new show not worth the time.
Leann- I have to say the first 2 seasons I thought she was a complete snob, but this season she showed alot of class. I think she let her hair down just enough to let everyone get to know her and be a real class act.
Kelly- Poor-poor Kelly. My heart went out to her at the resort with those vicious beeoches. i can say she did egg some of it on herself, that still did not merit the the way they attacked her. It was pitiful.
Kelly is kind of like a little girl in a woman’s body as we all are, little girls in womens bodies, still playing dress-up and tea parties. There will always be mean girls picking on the free-spirited ones because they lost their child like quality. I hope Kelly keeps her open heart and her free=spirit.
Sonja-New to the show. Probably a real party hog as we say down here in Tx. She just happened to pick the wrong crowd to run with, she picked the CRAZIES.
Simon-Probaly still in the closet and may never come out. What exactly does he do for a living?
Mario-Still thinking he’s hot, suave and debinere.
Last but not least Bobby- A stand by my woman man, thank God Jill has you to hold her up. You are what a husband is supposed to be. Loving, kind, gentle, and spoil your wife rotten. I personally think you should be on Americas best dressed men list.
To close I would again like to say that I have never blogged before and am not a very good typist after all i’m a female trim carpenter/cabinet builder. Jill you are truly an inspiration. I too love fabric, maybe a little too much, anyways I think you’re beautiful on the outside and as well as the inside. You’ve said many times you were blessed, and you are in so many ways. I belive all the housewives should get down on their knees and thank God every day for all they have because there are so many with so little or none at all. And I feel quite certain they don’t treat others the way some of these housewives do. Some people call it being humble. Isn’t it funny how people always attack others when they have an army behind them. Down here in Tejas we call them cowards not Heros. It takes a bigger man to admit he was wrong and apologize than it does to pick on those less able to fight back, they are also called Bullies, which I believe Kelly called those 4. She hit the nail on the head as we say down here. And one more thing what was that thing Alex shaking when you Jill walked into the resort? I thought the new Alibino Alex found her inner strength, personally I think she found something else inside, Nothing an exlax surely couldn’t fix. Anyways Jill, you go girl, Give em’ hell. We love you in Texas.
June 18th, 2010 at 7:45 pm
Jill –
Love you – and all the housewives –
IMHO you were so right in the Part 2 Reunion show – you did nothing wrong, you have a big heart, you’re smart, wise, and beautiful -
Maybe some of the other housewives are a little jealous -
Best wishes Jill – and to all the other housewives too!
Elvina Jones
June 18th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Hello Jill…I really felt you were getting a raw deal at the reunion shows. I sat there thinking ‘did i miss some episodes, why are these bitches and ppl so hard on her’ then I remembered everyone loves a underdog. When you put women in a room with two Titans, you and LuAnn, women are intimidated. That other couch,except for Sonjia, are weak minded individuals that need to cling to each other just to get a back bone. These women wanted you to break I seen it on Alex’s face while she sat there smirking as you cried…she is evil. I like you because you are who you are and real friends would not want you to change. Everyone spoke about how you talk about everyone behind their backs and that’s the show…from season 1 until now everyone back bites. I also like that fact you dont judge Kelley…I think Kelley is nutty, but that’s Kelley you dont understand her, but its clear she has a huge heart. You embrace that goofy, contridicting chick and correct her when she is wrong, and can still be a friend. LuAnn has been a true friend to you I would love for bravo to do a show where you go worldwide to find her a man…she is beautiful. Add Sonjia for comic relief. Bethenny says you really need to change..FUCK HER…you are consistent you dont need to change, your true friends should accept you regardless. I know you wanted to spoil Bethenny and her baby when you found out she was pregnant, I felt like that is why you wanted to make amends. Ramona is fake you have known her for 15 yrs. She has been your friend begged you to go on the trip and when you surprise her she takes Alex’s side. Last season she could not stand Alex, she made it seem as if Alex was walking H1N1. Now because Alex kisses her ass and jumped on Lets Diss Jill Train they are besties. Alex is gross. Where is she originally from Backwood, AR? she looks like hillbilly trash. Dont let squares in your circle Alex is definitely square. I feel like she is jealous of your relationship with the girls, stirs a little trouble, and sits back smirking..she is so ugly. When she was talking about her book. I thought who would buy that crap. I remember her bad ass kids. The book should be titled NO Discipline Run Free: The Start of Future Addicts. ALEX MCCORD, this is how Kelley said it, is a true trouble maker her outfits are dusty, not vintage just old. She is just EWWWW! She called you a “Mean Girl” the mean girl, part of the popular crew. Alex must have been the “Pee Girl” in school still holding on grudge on the popular girls. She needs to get a life.
I hope you come back next season the show would not be the same without you.
June 18th, 2010 at 3:51 pm
Hi Jill
I think most of them HAVE forgiven you.. I think they are simply just not sure that you have changed, so they are afraid that you will continue to make the same mistakes
When Bethenny said to you, “you have a lot of changing to do” you said “I CANT change.” That is the oppositve of what she wanted to hear. All people are capable of change. And you do need to change alot of your habits when it comes to friendship.
Apologies are great but unfortunately they are not enough- you have to prove that you have learned from them. Explain to these people what you will do differently in the future. Then prove it
They will eventually see the new you.. and you can move on from there. I AM you. I have had many dramatic relationships and I finally learned from them. I finally learned what I had to change and do differently. I learned how to treat people better and prove that I really was sorry and had changed.
Good luck. You have a big heart. You simply need to learn where to put all that emotion that you have in it
Less drama, more forgiveness and understanding
June 18th, 2010 at 12:44 pm
Dear Jill,
Your post is insightful and thought provoking. The only thing I have been able to piece together is that the women who do not accept your apology, doubt your intentions and question your motives, from THEIR past experiences with you and your apologies that seemed to them to be insincere, because of a repeating offense. In all fairness, they could cut you some slack, see what transpires, and where you all go from there.
It might take time for them to believe you are sincere, but I believe moving on from here – it is all up to you. If you have changed, it will come to the surface. At that point, if they choose to keep walls up, maintain hostility towards you, and ambush you after you earnestly and sincerely apologizing, then it is their loss, because it does seem you have a lot to offer.
Friendships have their highs and lows. The good news is when you have hit rock bottom, the only direction to go is up.
With apologies, they have to come from the heart and the nature of the error must make sense to you and come from a place of remorse for causing someone hurt, or insult etc…to see that it does not happen again.
This requires a degree of change on your part and theirs. If you have not truly come from a place of heartfelt sincerity, with a genuine sorrow for causing a hurt or transgression – admitting the fault and promising to not repeat the offense again, then I don’t know what to say, except it is up to you and after that apology – the ball is in their court.
If they decide to hold a grudge against you, if they refuse your apology, if they dismiss you, if they continue to badger you, then you may need respite from that toxicity, until you are stronger to deal with that negativity. You can rise above it, even if they don’t and continue to live your life and be who you genuinely are.
You know in your heart of hearts what your intentions and feelings are. You don’t need to apologize for having feelings and reacting only in the way you knew how at that particular moment in time. Sometimes emotions run too high and that is a sign that something might happen that would not be characteristic of who you are, because you may be caught off guard, where you have not been able to process what has been said. Then again, that may be a time to explore those feelings head on. Nobody likes to be thrust into confrontational episodes.
If you can wrap your heart and head around what the others are saying – where they are coming from and discuss it without tempers flaring, to perhaps just say, I need to think about that and reflect because I need to process what has just happened. It isn’t easy to rationally react on a whim when the world is watching. I could see how that could throw anyone off.
Perhaps a personal exercise that may help distinguish actual acts of egregiousness they attempt to point out vs. a misunderstanding or something that requires an apology.
I would write down what each person points out where they have taken personal offense by you as bullet points.
See if there is validity to what they state, then think about the part you may have played in that situation or how you were not involved.
Then answer/respond to each bullet point and decide if it is a truth or fiction. Truths get attention.
Write down your feelings and recollections and see if an apology is warranted. How you felt, what part you played in it. You could then personally have a one on one, when you are feeling up to it and discuss your findings and how your apology applies and IS heartfelt and that you have changed in that it won’t happen again because you DO realize and recognize the part you played.
If after all that, they can’t accept your apology, then it is really their hang up. Continue on your road, do what you do best and move on. They will see in time a change, a metamorphosis.
Everyone at one time or another has had friendship issues. Disagreements…Then there are people who were friends, who have grown distant and have changed themselves. There is something I’ve often read and it helps to put things into perspective for me…
A Reason, A Season, Or a Lifetime…
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON…It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a Godsend and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be.
The, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. Sometimes they die. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. Your need has been answered, and now it is time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON…It is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
I wish you peace and love.
June 18th, 2010 at 12:23 pm
One last bit about Alex–compared to Kelly, Alex is very normal (what a commentary, huh??). I don’t think she hates you–I think she took advantage about your lack of focus and insecurity this season. Make your peace with her–neither one of you will ever have too much in common, and will rarely see the world the same way, much less react the same way.
But I respect Alex for at least being consistent in her life. She’s never wavered in anything (good or just…ewww) and I think she got so rough with you because you were contradictory this last season. Alex’s complete acceptance of her own life and choices (she “owns” her life) is a good thing. Doesn’t mean I’d choose to live her life (again…ewww, no thanks), but I find her worthy of respect simply because at the base of it, her happiness in her life is the same kind of happiness and loyalty you have with Bobby and your daughter.
People WANT to trust people to be at least one way…regardless of opinions or viewpoint. Kelly and her responses of “peta, playboy, peta, playboy” just make her look like a shallow, ridiculous nut.
And LOOOOOVED your joke after Kelly’s return from Ramona’s girl-trip about Kelly’s fear for her gummi bears!!
June 18th, 2010 at 12:04 pm
Jill, I’ve posted a couple of times on FB but wasn’t sure if you’d get a chance to wade through all the replies so wanted to say it again here:
You’ve changed. You’ve apologized, found your feet and stood your ground when the women wanted to continue to beat you up, repeating things over and over and over. And for me, watching you in the three reunion shows, I saw through all of it, your heart-felt wish in your eyes that you and Bethenny might find new ground.
I think you’ve said all you can say, done all you can do for now, and cried enough—you know that even if you could do any of these things MORE, it still wouldn’t make a difference. So live your life, changed as you are now, and find your peace and happiness again.
However…ease away from Kelly, if you haven’t already figured it out. She is the worst, and to me, she reflects the worst you, all of us, can be—contradictory, sketchy, STUPID and just shallow.
Good luck!
June 18th, 2010 at 11:38 am
Jill, you are my favorite housewife. This season, I think you showed all your critics just how genuine and well intentioned you really are. It is most definitely time to stop apologizing because these women are relentless and obviously unforgiving. You can only do so much, if they refuse to meet you half way, you can at least say you apologized and tried to move forward. I really respect you for acknowledging your faults and working on yourself, perhaps we all need to “check” ourselves here and there because in the end no one is perfect and no one ever does the right thing all the time. I really hope you decide to come back to the show next season, it won’t be the same without you; you keep housewives real.
June 18th, 2010 at 10:29 am
I just posted this on facebook. It certainly looks like I am not the only one who thinks you have done all that you can to diffuse the nasty of this season. *cheers*
Via Facebook: I am not sure where to post this, but I just finished watching part 2. I am not sure I am up to watching part 3. They were brutal on you. I understand where you were coming from and how sometimes when you watch back certain behaviors you can be a little embarassed. You have apologized repeatedly and it will be so hard to have to hear you say “I apologize” even one more time. Keep your chin up and reaching for the stars. I think you are fabulous.
June 18th, 2010 at 9:38 am
Jill, you’re right, we don’t see all that occurs on and off the show. I only know that to be forgiven, one must forgive. Why can’t you forgive Alex? At least she is honest and in your face, not behind your back. Give her a break, look at her heart, and get over it. The true test of YOUR character will be reaching down and truly finding it in yourself to forgive and forget when it comes to her. Good luck and my prayers are with you. Luv, ya.
June 18th, 2010 at 8:10 am
Dear Jill,
I enjoyed watching the “Reunion” series. I wanted to let you know how bad I felt for you. It had to be so hard sitting there taking all you took. I think you are a wonderful, kind, thoughtful, generous person. This wasn’t the best season for you, but you know that and your moving ahead. You have apologized many, many times to everyone on the show. Enough!! If they can’t move on, then too bad. You have all but begged Bethenny to be your friend again. If she can’t accept your apology, and you for who you are, then she’s missing out. As far as Ramona and LuAnn go, at least you know what your up against. I think Ramona has a big mouth and now that she’s “renewed”, she feels “redeemed”. Alex cannot complete a thought on her own. Who cares if you never speak to her again. She brings nothing to the mix. Simon is way more interesting than she is. Her kids are poorly behaved and messy looking. I made my decision on her when she “delivered” the message to you at Ramona’s party. Not only was it TOTALLY inappropriate, but it was rude. Shame on Alex. It made her look like a total fool, but I don’t think ANYONE but you and I realized that.
I hope you recover from your public slaying. I wanted to let you know how bad I felt for you. You seem like a genuine person and a good friend. I hope Bobby stays healthy and Ally enjoys college. My oldest is graduating 8th grade on 6/23. I can only imaging the tears you had a high school graduation!!
Best of health and happiness.
Lisa M.
June 18th, 2010 at 7:52 am
Hi Jill, After seeing last nights reunion show, I was very surprised it looked like Team B had a plan to attack Team J all thru the show! Thought you three handled it with class and deflected the low blows when you could. We could see that there was more going on underneath it all.. Like alex finds her voice! (Talk about being a mean girl) they were like the mean girls in high school. I loved your wanna be bethanny one liners.. even though they didnt come out as funny!! she has had years of experience being mean/funny!! Also very surprised at andy it looked like he was on team b’s side and hammered the blows. remember we all love you for being you! sweet, lovable, caring Jill, so hope next year you will be yourself!!
June 18th, 2010 at 4:11 am
Jill,
I wanted to let you know that you are hands down my favorite housewife of all time. I wanted to let you know that me, my family and friends all adore you! I am so mad that you got so much slack at the reunion shows! I just have one question, why didn’t you tell Alex and Ramona to drop dead? They are not even worth your time and you let them upset you!! I also can’t believe that Alex even is on the show! She is such a wannabe and she looked like a JOKE at the reunion.
I hope you come back next season and don’t even waste your time with those women. They are not up to par, you are way too high brow to even associate with them!
As far as the Bethany thing, I find her beyond rude, crass and annoying but I hope that you come to a place with her that makes you happy!
Hope you are doing fabulous!
June 18th, 2010 at 3:13 am
Dear Jill
“i believe that forgivness is the key to your own happiness ♥”
Let me start off by saying what an amazing person you are regardless of all the “mistakes” you say you have made mentioned in the reunion show and what I can say is WOW nice to know your human eh ?. Anyways like I always say it’s quicker to count the things that aren’t wrong with you than to count the things that are no one is perfect even if they try , but you do your best and somehow its always easier for them to pick out other faults so quickly. If we all took are time to sit there and point out negatives in each other epically people we care about , work with and so on we would never get anywhere in life .We may not know you like the girls say they know you but what can you do when your life seems to be in a spotlight 24/7 people are bound to say things about people when they are angry their just happens to be cameras around in the heated moments. Where as others who are not on a reality show are able to say behind closed doors. Its funny the opinions and comments people can say when they have never been in that situation. You are human you have feelings you have friendships and its not fair for anyone to doubt that they are not genuine , people say you don’t want to look bad well guess what nobody does. I truly believe that you have a good heart you mean well and do a lot of good things for others. I wish you the best in life and hope that everything goes well for you in what ever you pursue , And I really hope that your friendship with Bethany finds common ground because what I can see from the show you had a great friendship and it is definitely something Worthing saving and no matter what happens I truly believe your in each others hearts forever even with the good the bad and the ugly because true friendship stays with you forever.
“I think that sometimes we love people so much that we almost have to be numb to it , because if we actually feel how much we really loved them it would kill us , and that doesn’t make you a bad person that just means your hearts to big “
And this reminds me of that
All the best
Kai!
June 18th, 2010 at 1:14 am
JILL
YOU ARE ONE OF MY FAVORITE HOUSEWIVES. EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES AND YOU HAVE BY FAR APOLOGIZED ENOUGH FOR THINGS. I AGREE WITH EVERYONE AND JUST FOCUS WHAT YOU HAVE, WHO ARE ARE, AND WHO IS THERE FOR YOU. I FULLY BELIEVE EVERYTHING WILL FALL INTO PLACE AND IF IT WAS MENT TO BE IT WILL. I THINK YOU SHOWED ALOT OF CLASS DURING THE REUNION SHOW, AND BE WHO YOU ARE. WE ALL HAVE PEOPLE THAT WE DONT GET ALONG WITH IT IS LIFE IT HAPPENS.
June 18th, 2010 at 1:03 am
Jill,
I’m a big fan. I thought that you unfairly received alot of flack from the housewives. I also thought Alex was very mean towards you and especially her face did seem full of hate. i hope you’ll be back or else the show won’t be worth watching without you.
June 18th, 2010 at 12:20 am
and to forgive is to forget, so let the past be the past and enjoy each moment because today is a gift that’s why they call it the present. I’m not saying Bethenny is 100% right, just don’t waste anymore time. I loved watching you two together and I miss that.
June 17th, 2010 at 11:52 pm
Jill, I usually don’t seek out celebrities to comment on their comings & goings but I have to tell you that I really felt compelled to do so after watching this season. I am really annoyed with this perponderance of prejudice I’ve seen happen between the “women on the other couch” as I will refer to as. I know that you don’t know me from the next Joe but I hope that this will help you understand my objectivity here. These women are so pumped up on hate (maybe drugs too in ramonas case) that it’s just an all out witch hunt now. I’ve watched the entire season and I just can’t see where you have fouled any more than they have. I so admire your will to apologize but honey I gotta tell you— you never really owed anyone the level of apologizing you’ve done. As said before — the fame got to EVERY one’s head! I font know what’s going on behind the scenes but to me it seems like Bethany rubbed shoulders with just the right person and the other croonies are just following miss popular. Face it hon– the extreme jealousy has bonded them and you should walk away with your dignity now. When beths 15 min are over — we’ll see how solid their friendships are. Ooh 1 more thing. If Beth was ever truly truly your friend— she would have gotten over it. You.did.nothing.to.deserve.this.
June 17th, 2010 at 11:20 pm
Jill,
I want to let you know that you are truly an inspiration! You have realized where you have mess up and are able to admit when you were wrong. I have such a hard time saying ‘I’m sorry’. You speak your mind and I’m the same way. Watching these reunion shows, I feel I have ammends to make, so I wanted to thank you for opening up my eyes.
I pray that everything will work out the way you would want it to. Sometimes you need to be cut your losses. And honestly some of the woman on the show are like poison and your life would be so much more positive and less stressful without them in it.
Nothing but the warmest wishes,
Lindsey
June 17th, 2010 at 10:22 pm
Jill,
I have been a big fan of yours throughout all 3 season. Not only are u classy but you have a good heart. You have apologized enough and have no need to keep doing it. Ramona, Alex and Bethenny think they are all high and mighty and have every right to judge everyone else’s faults but their own. Let’s not forget that there is only one person has can judge us and that is God. We as humans can ask to be forgiven only so many times. They have said far worst things about Alex and her family before so for them to act like they are better than you is not right. Alex needs to get off her high horse and apologize for the awful things she has said as well as Ramona. But you are way better off without them. You have Luann and Kelly who have not judged and stood behind you like real friends are supposed to. Also, remember that you have alot of fans that love you and will always have your back regardless of mistakes you make. We are all human and will make mistakes and all we can do is get up, dust ourselves off and move on. I wish nothing but good things for you cause you deserve them.
Many Blessing,
Vanessa
#1 fan from Texas
June 17th, 2010 at 10:19 pm
Jill,
You are fabulous! You handled yourself with so much grace and class. You also look amazing! Don’t change the beautiful person you are inside and out.
June 17th, 2010 at 10:02 pm
Jill, I loved you on the first two seasons and I think you truly did not realize what was happening on this season until it was to late. I do have one comment to you above blog. Its not about how many times you ask for forgiveness, but its more how sincere and genuine you are when you ask? I do not now you and therefor can only speculte to your senserity. The women on the show do, however, know you and I think it is telling that they simply don’t take you at face value. Maybe they know you beter than what you protray on TV.
June 17th, 2010 at 9:50 pm
Yes, To err is human…..and you have been kind enough to take responsiblity for your errors, BUT you do not deserve the wave of blame and judgement from Romana, Alex, & especially Bethanny, have claimed you deserve.
I just don’t see it. Why do you have to say you are “sorry” for everything and Bethanny is exempt? She has really played the victim card in this situation, and I am not buying it. I do not believe Beathanny has any remorse for her nastiness. There is no hope of any “true” friendship with this kind of person, and she will only keep hurting you, Jill. I know you are the stronger person, but you are a kind person who derserves a loyal friend that respects you….not a “frienemy” that keeps you in tears. Please do not give Beathanny the chance to hurt you anymore, it’s so painful to watch
Please know, we all love you out here and support you! Take care & best wishes!
June 17th, 2010 at 9:14 pm
Jill! You are awesome… don’t worry about the negative comments. Life can get the best of you sometimes but I feel like you are a true example of how to really be true to yourself even when others are against you! Anytime a friendship gets hard people feel bad and regret what they say… so for people to put you on some platform like you are cannot make mistakes is unreal. The strongest people always get the most heat! remember that:) love the show! and don’t let people get you down!
Jen
June 17th, 2010 at 8:50 pm
I don’t think you have any reason to keep apologizing. The other women continue to hurl unsubstantiated accusations and are behaving like children, and you don’t deserve this. I will continue to cheer for you!
June 17th, 2010 at 6:50 pm
Hi Jill, I do not know if you will read this (lots of replies). I agree with your post that you have apoligized enough. However, I do understand why the ladies are not seeming to accept it. It is like the boy who cried wolf. Whe should the boy be believed? you know what I mean? I think it will just take time and your demonstration that you are not the person we all saw this season. I myself made almost unforgivable mistakes with my husband but know we have a great relationship. But it took time for my husband to see that I have changed. I know many viewers are upset with you. I was myself because, well the things you did were really awful. I loved you in season 1 & 2 but something changed in season 3. We want the old Jill back.
I think you are getting such hateful posts is because we loved you for the past seasons. Love and Hate are opposite sides of a coin. We loved you passionately and now some hate you passionately, ya know what I mean. You have an awesome family and I know you will make the right changes. Please take this message in the spirit it is given and do not give anyone a chance to make any more hateful responses. Give no more nasty tweets or messages about anybody in the press and I know things will turn around for you. We all love you and can’t wait for the next season where we can love you again but you will need to ‘show’ people this. I wish you and your family nothing but the best.
Lisa
June 17th, 2010 at 6:38 pm
Hi Jill! I really think you have apologized enough and I feel that you are sincere about every single one of them. As a person who has had a falling out with their family and seeing how precious relationships are with people, we should never take anyone for granted. My falling out was due to my family not accepting my sexuality of being gay and their inability or unwillingness to learn that people are just who they are. You are who you are and you shouldn’t deviate from that.
You’re a great mom, wife, and supportive friend. Even though your delivery may come across as harsh, your intentions are pure and have good intentions. In many ways I see a lot of myself in you because you don’t forget those that hurt you, but you are always there with your arms open, ready to forgive and move on to a better place. I wish my family would do the same for me as you wish your friends would do the same for you.
Take care and hope to see you around on TV.
Respectfully yours,
Matthew M from San Antonio, TX
June 17th, 2010 at 6:26 pm
Jill,
I love the show and i really admire you!!After watching the reuion i really felt like you kept being attack.i want to say to all the other ladies on the show GROW UP. They speak about forgivness but they are hypocrites if you ask me. Jill hang in there and don’t feel like you have to surround yourself with people that does not want to forgive and forget. You have a lot of friends and family that will be there for you so continue being the wonderful and inspiring woman you are.
June 17th, 2010 at 6:19 pm
Well Jill i have so been in your shoes with the Bethenny relationship. My relationship was with a girl named Stephanie. I went to school with her and worked with her. I had never had a friend who I was so close to that we actually understood each other and loved each other like sisters. I could tell her anything. She was with a guy who I couldnt get along with and he was so mean to her, I never knew when to draw the line in giving her advice and begging her to leave him. She got pregnant and had a beautiful baby boy, I never seen her so happy. She didnt return to work one day her boyfriend called me and said she wouldnt be returning. He arrived at my work to tell me what he thought of me and was clinchng his fists he was so angry. Apparently they had a fight and she voiced what i had told her to do. I was devastated she wasnt answering her phone and I couldnt reach her i drove by her house, seen her on her porch she looked horrible but i couldnt reach her cause of him. I was so depressed for days crying not wanting to eat we went from always together and on the phone 100 times a day to no contact. 4 days later she calls and tells me she needs help out, her uncle picked her up and brought her to me with the baby and I put them on a plane to new jersey to her parents. I gave her money and on the trip to the airport she is telling me how mean he was with her violently and mentally. I never cried so hard with her. Her dad made her feel bad on her breaking up her family so she returned to him and will not respond to my calls or when i see her in town. She told him when she returned who all helped her out to get out. She is not to have any contact with me whatsoever. I loved your comment like it was like a death. She was my best friend and can never be replaced, whats hurtful is i see her around town and we are strangers. It’s one of the worst things ive went through i so understand what you felt like.